Detachment, Giving Up Problems
"What is the sound of one hand clapping?"
— Zen koan
For many people, life remains a mystery, a puzzle they never solve. And, if you do not know how to solve your problems, or how to truly detach from them, you may feel very oppressed by life. Could there be a simple solution to this problem, a way to simply give up problems? Some people would argue that it is only your judgments about life that cause you to label any of your experiences in life as "problems"; they would assert that everything is an opportunity to learn; you only have to see it that way. They would say there are no problems, only solutions waiting to happen. And, rather than rejecting anything in life, if we accept it and embrace it rather than trying to avoid it, we may "find" ourselves in the problem. But, that's just it: do we really find ourselves in problems or lose our selves in them? Is it better to be more engaged, impassioned, absorbed, or detached? Maybe the riddle, the much-sought-after sound of one hand clapping, provides an answer: detachment.
Consider what it means to "be in the world but not of the world," as Jesus taught. Is it possible to be engaged in life, and detached; compassionate, and detached; involved, and detached; loving, and detached; wise, and detached? Yes. Detachment simply means finding a place to stand in our own self, in the ground of our own being, so that we are not reactive to everything and everyone around us. When we learn to stand in our own being, though we are in the world we are not a product of the world; we are more connected to source or cause, than effect.
Being detached means learning to be more objective, find the truth, listen to your conscience, and honor your inner being. It is a Way of Being. In this true state of Being, living from your center, here, now, it is possible to let go of the incessant pull of opposites: wealth and poverty, power and helplessness, love and hate, expectation and disappointment, restraint and indulgence, ambition and contentment, dependence and independence, aversion and desire. What gets lost in all of this is You; all you feel is what is pulling on you, or driving you.
When we consider detachment, it is important to realize that we are not talking about denial. Detachment is a process of learning to let go of problems, learning to give them up, learning to not be controlled by them or unduly affected by them. This is essentially a spiritual skill, based upon greater clarity of awareness, insight into the true nature of things, and acknowledgment and acceptance of a Greater Reality — such that you no longer feel so trapped or oppressed by life in this world. Denial, in contrast, is a process of reducing your awareness, limiting your perceptions, and minimizing your understanding of or ability to get past your problems. They are, in many ways, opposite approaches to solving problems. They are similar only to the extent that in either case you might feel a kind of separation from your problems. Denial is based in the attempt to remain ignorant of or unaware of what is so, in reality; detachment is based in a greater perspective, awareness, and understanding. True detachment is based upon the wisdom and perspective that there may be an answer we may not know, but we have faith that it will come to pass. With detachment we can see and say, "This too shall pass." read more ...
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